First Person: Shock, Silence and Speaking Out: A Week in the Wake of Charlie Kirk’s Assassination

When I was planning to go to Algonquin College, I had some apprehension due to my beliefs. As a conservative Christian, I had heard our views weren’t welcome on college campuses.

However, I believed the idea that we were hated was hyperbolic, that people simply disagreed with us.

This belief was shaken when, on Wednesday, Sept. 10, in the middle of class, a student blurted out that Charlie Kirk (a prominent conservative Christian) had been shot.

The atmosphere in the class changed. There was an almost jovial attitude in the air. Some students began making fun of Donald Trump’s call for prayer. Others laughed at the situation. One started talking along the lines of “well what do you expect,” as though he had it coming.

When I saw this, I didn’t know how to feel. I just sat there silently; sad he’d been shot but uncertain about how to react. During a break, I stepped outside the classroom with a student I’ll call Jeffrey, who was upset, saying their behaviour was unfitting for journalists.

When I got home, I learned Kirk had passed. I replayed the situation over in my head and realized they had rejoiced over a man’s death. I was disgusted, disturbed and angry.

Later, I called my mother to get her thoughts. The first thing she asked was, what did you say? Did you stand up for him?

Immediately I was hit with guilt. Here’s a Christian man who professed God in the public square and I didn’t defend him. I felt like a coward.

As we talked, my mom softened a bit. She said it sounded like I was in shock. Which made me feel better. I told myself maybe it wasn’t the right time to speak up. A cop out? Maybe, but it got me over my guilt for the time being.

That night, I didn’t sleep. I was wired, working at my computer when I could, pacing the floor when I couldn’t.

On Thursday, I begrudgingly went back to the campus. When I got there, I went out with a couple of other students to cover a union strike. On the way, they started talking about Kirk. They said they had no empathy for him, his wife and kids maybe, but not him. I thought to myself, should I say anything? Again, the guilt and uncertainty came back. I stayed silent and nothing else was said that day.

I still didn’t have any peace, but at about midnight, I finally got tired enough to sleep.

On Friday, some academic issues came up. Between these and the Kirk situation, I began planning to drop out.

On Saturday, I called Jeffrey. We spoke for about 20 minutes and I told him my plans. He said we’re close to graduating, just hang in there. He also advised me to call my parents. Between talking to them and Jeffrey, I decided not to quit.

On Monday, the academic issues got worked out.

On Wednesday, one week after the shooting, the class started talking about how people were getting fired for celebrating Kirk’s death. It became clear they were trying to justify them. A white-hot anger rose in me and I said these companies were right to fire them.

Then they began comparing Kirk to Adolf Hitler and Osama bin Laden. I responded, “He wasn’t a terrorist or genocidal.”

Later, we were doing a class exercise, hunting for news stories. I found one about Barack Obama condemning political violence and the professor let me read his quote to the class.

After this, none of them openly badmouthed Kirk again, which made coming to class more tolerable.

So, do people hate conservative Christians? Did these students? It felt that way to me but I’m not a mind reader and I didn’t ask.

Afterwards, I become guarded, only wanting to hang out with students like Jeffery, who didn’t agree with Kirk but were disappointed with the other students’ behaviour. A mindset I still wrestle with.

Elsewhere, I heard questions about Kirk’s character and what he represented.

I talked with Dean Skinner, my pastor at Bethel Church, who pointed to a reported increase in church attendance following Kirk’s assassination.

He quoted Matthew 7:20 “by their fruit, you shall know them.” He said the fruit of Kirk’s death wasn’t burning down buildings or rioting. It was people giving their lives to the Lord and dedicating themselves to him.

Like me, he found no evidence of racist or sexist behaviour from Kirk, noting how many things were taken out of context and that although he said a woman’s highest calling was being a mother and wife, he employed many women.

I believe Kirk’s legacy was trying to foster an open dialogue, being humble enough to listen to people you disagree with but bold enough to speak out. An example I endeavour to follow.